To Build A Fire By Jack London
To Build A Fire By Jack London
DAY HAD BROKEN cold and gray, exceedingly cold and gray, when the man turned aside from the main Yukon trail and climbed the high earth-bank, where a dim and little-travelled trail led eastward through the fat spruce timberland. It was a steep bank, and he paused for breath at the top, excusing the act to himself by looking at his watch. It was nine o'clock. There was no sun nor hint of sun, though there was not a cloud in the sky. It was a clear day, and yet there seemed an intangible pall over the face of things, a subtle gloom that made the day dark, and that was due to the absence of sun. This fact did not worry the man. He was used to the lack of sun. It had been days since he had seen the sun, and he knew that a few more days must pass before that cheerful orb, due south, would just peep above the sky-line and dip immediately from view.
The man flung a look
back along the way he had come. The Yukon lay a mile wide and hidden under
three feet of ice. On top of this ice were as many feet of snow. It was all
pure white, rolling in gentle undulations where the ice-jams of the freeze-up
had formed. North and south, as far as his eye could see, it was unbroken
white, save for a dark hair-line that curved and twisted from around the
spruce-covered island to the south, and that curved and twisted away into the
north, where it disappeared behind another spruce-covered island. This dark
hair-line was the trail—the main trail—that led south five hundred miles to the
Chilcoot Pass, Dyea, and salt water; and that led north seventy miles to
Dawson, and still on to the north a thousand miles to Nulato, and finally to
St. Michael on Bering Sea, a thousand miles and half a thousand more.
But all this—the
mysterious, far-reaching hair-line trail, the absence of sun from the sky, the
tremendous cold, and the strangeness and weirdness of it all—made no impression
on the man. It was not because he was long used to it. He was a newcomer in the
land, a chechaquo, and this was his first winter. The trouble with
him was that he was without imagination. He was quick and alert in the things
of life, but only in the things, and not in the significances. Fifty degrees
below zero meant eighty-odd degrees of frost. Such fact impressed him as being
cold and uncomfortable, and that was all. It did not lead him to meditate upon
his frailty as a creature of temperature, and upon man's frailty in general,
able only to live within certain narrow limits of heat and cold; and from there
on it did not lead him to the conjectural field of immortality and man's place
in the universe. Fifty degrees below zero stood for a bite of frost that hurt
and that must be guarded against by the use of mittens, ear-flaps, warm
moccasins, and thick socks. Fifty degrees below zero was to him just precisely
fifty degrees below zero. That there should be anything more to it than that
was a thought that never entered his head.
As he turned to go on, he
spat speculatively. There was a sharp, explosive crackle that startled him. He
spat again. And again, in the air, before it could fall to the snow, the
spittle crackled. He knew that at fifty below spittle crackled on the snow, but
this spittle had crackled in the air. Undoubtedly it was colder than fifty
below—how much colder he did not know. But the temperature did not matter. He
was bound for the old claim on the left fork of Henderson Creek, where the boys
were already. They had come over across the divide from the Indian Creek
country, while he had come the roundabout way to take a look at the
possibilities of getting out logs in the spring from the islands in the Yukon.
He would be in to camp by six o'clock; a bit after dark, it was true, but the boys
would be there, a fire would be going, and a hot supper would be ready. As for
lunch, he pressed his hand against the protruding bundle under his jacket. It
was also under his shirt, wrapped up in a handkerchief and lying against the
naked skin. It was the only way to keep the biscuits from freezing. He smiled
agreeably to himself as he thought of those biscuits, each cut open and sopped
in bacon grease, and each enclosing a generous slice of fried bacon.
He plunged in among the
big spruce trees. The trail was faint. A foot of snow had fallen since the last
sled had passed over, and he was glad he was without a sled, travelling light.
In fact, he carried nothing but the lunch wrapped in the handkerchief. He was
surprised, however, at the cold. It certainly was cold, he concluded, as he
rubbed his numb nose and cheek-bones with his mittened hand. He was a
warm-whiskered man, but the hair on his face did not protect the high
cheek-bones and the eager nose that thrust itself aggressively into the frosty
air.
At the man's heels
trotted a dog, a big native husky, the proper wolf-dog, gray-coated and without
any visible or temperamental difference from its brother, the wild wolf. The animal
was depressed by the tremendous cold. It knew that it was no time for
travelling. Its instinct told it a truer tale than was told to the man by the
man's judgment. In reality, it was not merely colder than fifty below zero; it
was colder than sixty below, than seventy below. It was seventy-five below
zero. Since the freezing-point is thirty-two above zero, it meant that one
hundred and seven degrees of frost obtained. The dog did not know anything
about thermometers. Possibly in its brain there was no sharp consciousness of a
condition of very cold such as was in the man's brain. But the brute had its
instinct. It experienced a vague but menacing apprehension that subdued it and
made it slink along at the man's heels, and that made it question eagerly every
unwonted movement of the man as if expecting him to go into camp or to seek
shelter somewhere and build a fire. The dog had learned fire, and it wanted
fire, or else to burrow under the snow and cuddle its warmth away from the air.
The frozen moisture of
its breathing had settled on its fur in a fine powder of frost, and especially
were its jowls, muzzle, and eyelashes whitened by its crystalled breath. The
man's red beard and mustache were likewise frosted, but more solidly, the
deposit taking the form of ice and increasing with every warm, moist breath he
exhaled. Also, the man was chewing tobacco, and the muzzle of ice held his lips
so rigidly that he was unable to clear his chin when he expelled the juice. The
result was that a crystal beard of the color and solidity of amber was
increasing its length on his chin. If he fell down it would shatter itself,
like glass, into brittle fragments. But he did not mind the appendage. It was
the penalty all tobacco-chewers paid in that country, and he had been out
before in two cold snaps. They had not been so cold as this, he knew, but by
the spirit thermometer at Sixty Mile he knew they had been registered at fifty
below and at fifty-five.
He held on through the
level stretch of woods for several miles, crossed a wide flat of niggerheads,
and dropped down a bank to the frozen bed of a small stream. This was Henderson
Creek, and he knew he was ten miles from the forks. He looked at his watch. It
was ten o'clock. He was making four miles an hour, and he calculated that he
would arrive at the forks at half-past twelve. He decided to celebrate that
event by eating his lunch there.
The dog dropped in again
at his heels, with a tail drooping discouragement, as the man swung along the
creek-bed. The furrow of the old sled-trail was plainly visible, but a dozen
inches of snow covered the marks of the last runners. In a month no man had
come up or down that silent creek. The man held steadily on. He was not much
given to thinking, and just then particularly he had nothing to think about
save that he would eat lunch at the forks and that at six o'clock he would be
in camp with the boys. There was nobody to talk to; and, had there been, speech
would have been impossible because of the ice-muzzle on his mouth. So he continued
monotonously to chew tobacco and to increase the length of his amber beard.
Once in a while the
thought reiterated itself that it was very cold and that he had never
experienced such cold. As he walked along he rubbed his cheek-bones and nose
with the back of his mittened hand. He did this automatically, now and again
changing hands. But rub as he would, the instant he stopped his cheek-bones
went numb, and the following instant the end of his nose went numb. He was sure
to frost his cheeks; he knew that, and experienced a pang of regret that he had
not devised a nose-strap of the sort Bud wore in cold snaps. Such a strap
passed across the cheeks, as well, and saved them. But it didn't matter much,
after all. What were frosted cheeks? A bit painful, that was all; they were
never serious.
Empty as the man's mind
was of thoughts, he was keenly observant, and he noticed the changes in the
creek, the curves and bends and timber-jams, and always he sharply noted where
he placed his feet. Once, coming around a bend, he shied abruptly, like a
startled horse, curved away from the place where he had been walking, and
retreated several paces back along the trail. The creek he knew was frozen
clear to the bottom,—no creek could contain water in that arctic winter,—but he
knew also that there were springs that bubbled out from the hillsides and ran
along under the snow and on top the ice of the creek. He knew that the coldest
snaps never froze these springs, and he knew likewise their danger. They were
traps. They hid pools of water under the snow that might be three inches deep,
or three feet. Sometimes a skin of ice half an inch thick covered them, and in
turn was covered by the snow. Sometimes there were alternate layers of water
and ice-skin, so that when one broke through he kept on breaking through for a
while, sometimes wetting himself to the waist.
That was why he had
shied in such panic. He had felt the give under his feet and heard the crackle
of a snow-hidden ice-skin. And to get his feet wet in such a temperature meant
trouble and danger. At the very least it meant delay, for he would be forced to
stop and build a fire, and under its protection to bare his feet while he dried
his socks and moccasins. He stood and studied the creek-bed and its banks, and
decided that the flow of water came from the right. He reflected awhile,
rubbing his nose and cheeks, then skirted to the left, stepping gingerly and
testing the footing for each step. Once clear of the danger, he took a fresh
chew of tobacco and swung along at his four-mile gait. In the course of the
next two hours he came upon several similar traps. Usually the snow above the
hidden pools had a sunken, candied appearance that advertised the danger. Once
again, however, he had a close call; and once, suspecting danger, he compelled
the dog to go on in front. The dog did not want to go. It hung back until the
man shoved it forward, and then it went quickly across the white, unbroken
surface. Suddenly it broke through, floundered to one side, and got away to
firmer footing. It had wet its forefeet and legs, and almost immediately the
water that clung to it turned to ice. It made quick efforts to lick the ice off
its legs, then dropped down in the snow and began to bite out the ice that had
formed between the toes. This was a matter of instinct. To permit the ice to
remain would mean sore feet. It did not know this. It merely obeyed the
mysterious prompting that arose from the deep crypts of its being. But the man
knew, having achieved a judgment on the subject, and he removed the mitten from
his right hand and helped tear out the ice-particles. He did not expose his
fingers more than a minute, and was astonished at the swift numbness that smote
them. It certainly was cold. He pulled on the mitten hastily, and beat the hand
savagely across his chest.
At twelve o'clock the
day was at its brightest. Yet the sun was too far south on its winter journey
to clear the horizon. The bulge of the earth intervened between it and
Henderson Creek, where the man walked under a clear sky at noon and cast no
shadow. At half-past twelve, to the minute, he arrived at the forks of the
creek. He was pleased at the speed he had made. If he kept it up, he would
certainly be with the boys by six. He unbuttoned his jacket and shirt and drew
forth his lunch. The action consumed no more than a quarter of a minute, yet in
that brief moment the numbness laid hold of the exposed fingers. He did not put
the mitten on, but, instead, struck the fingers a dozen sharp smashes against
his leg. Then he sat down on a snow-covered log to eat. The sting that followed
upon the striking of his fingers against his leg ceased so quickly that he was
startled. He had had no chance to take a bite of biscuit. He struck the fingers
repeatedly and returned them to the mitten, baring the other hand for the
purpose of eating. He tried to take a mouthful, but the ice-muzzle prevented.
He had forgotten to build a fire and thaw out. He chuckled at his foolishness,
and as he chuckled he noted the numbness creeping into the exposed fingers.
Also, he noted that the stinging which had first come to his toes when he sat
down was already passing away. He wondered whether the toes were warm or numb.
He moved them inside the moccasins and decided that they were numb.
He pulled the mitten on
hurriedly and stood up. He was a bit frightened. He stamped up and down until
the stinging returned into the feet. It certainly was cold, was his thought.
That man from Sulphur Creek had spoken the truth when telling how cold it
sometimes got in the country. And he had laughed at him at the time! That
showed one must not be too sure of things. There was no mistake about it, it wascold.
He strode up and down, stamping his feet and threshing his arms, until
reassured by the returning warmth. Then he got out matches and proceeded to
make a fire. From the undergrowth, where high water of the previous spring had
lodged a supply of seasoned twigs, he got his fire-wood. Working carefully from
a small beginning, he soon had a roaring fire, over which he thawed the ice
from his face and in the protection of which he ate his biscuits. For the
moment the cold of space was outwitted. The dog took satisfaction in the fire,
stretching out close enough for warmth and far enough away to escape being
singed.
When the man had
finished, he filled his pipe and took his comfortable time over a smoke. Then
he pulled on his mittens, settled the ear-flaps of his cap firmly about his
ears, and took the creek trail up the left fork. The dog was disappointed and
yearned back toward the fire. This man did not know cold. Possibly all the
generations of his ancestry had been ignorant of cold, of real cold, of cold
one hundred and seven degrees below freezing-point. But the dog knew; all its
ancestry knew, and it had inherited the knowledge. And it knew that it was not
good to walk abroad in such fearful cold. It was the time to lie snug in a hole
in the snow and wait for a curtain of cloud to be drawn across the face of
outer space whence this cold came. On the other hand, there was no keen
intimacy between the dog and the man. The one was the toil-slave of the other,
and the only caresses it had ever received were the caresses of the whip-lash
and of harsh and menacing throat-sounds that threatened the whip-lash. So the
dog made no effort to communicate its apprehension to the man. It was not
concerned in the welfare of the man; it was for its own sake that it yearned
back toward the fire. But the man whistled, and spoke to it with the sound of
whip-lashes, and the dog swung in at the man's heels and followed after.
The man took a chew of
tobacco and proceeded to start a new amber beard. Also, his moist breath quickly
powdered with white his mustache, eyebrows, and lashes. There did not seem to
be so many springs on the left fork of the Henderson, and for half an hour the
man saw no signs of any. And then it happened. At a place where there were no
signs, where the soft, unbroken snow seemed to advertise solidity beneath, the
man broke through. It was not deep. He wet himself halfway to the knees before
he floundered out to the firm crust.
He was angry, and cursed
his luck aloud. He had hoped to get into camp with the boys at six o'clock, and
this would delay him an hour, for he would have to build a fire and dry out his
foot-gear. This was imperative at that low temperature—he knew that much; and
he turned aside to the bank, which he climbed. On top, tangled in the
underbrush about the trunks of several small spruce trees, was a high-water
deposit of dry fire-wood—sticks and twigs, principally, but also larger
portions of seasoned branches and fine, dry, last-year's grasses. He threw down
several large pieces on top of the snow. This served for a foundation and
prevented the young flame from drowning itself in the snow it otherwise would
melt. The flame he got by touching a match to a small shred of birch-bark that
he took from his pocket. This burned even more readily than paper. Placing it
on the foundation, he fed the young flame with wisps of dry grass and with the
tiniest dry twigs.
He worked slowly and
carefully, keenly aware of his danger. Gradually, as the flame grew stronger,
he increased the size of the twigs with which he fed it. He squatted in the
snow, pulling the twigs out from their entanglement in the brush and feeding
directly to the flame. He knew there must be no failure. When it is
seventy-five below zero, a man must not fail in his first attempt to build a
fire—that is, if his feet are wet. If his feet are dry, and he fails, he can
run along the trail for half a mile and restore his circulation. But the
circulation of wet and freezing feet cannot be restored by running when it is
seventy-five below. No matter how fast he runs, the wet feet will freeze the
harder.
All this the man knew.
The old-timer on Sulphur Creek had told him about it the previous fall, and now
he was appreciating the advice. Already all sensation had gone out of his feet.
To build the fire he had been forced to remove his mittens, and the fingers had
quickly gone numb. His pace of four miles an hour had kept his heart pumping
blood to the surface of his body and to all the extremities. But the instant he
stopped, the action of the pump eased down. The cold of space smote the
unprotected tip of the planet, and he, being on that unprotected tip, received
the full force of the blow. The blood of his body recoiled before it. The blood
was alive, like the dog, and like the dog it wanted to hide away and cover
itself up from the fearful cold. So long as he walked four miles an hour, he
pumped that blood, willy-nilly, to the surface; but now it ebbed away and sank
down into the recesses of his body. The extremities were the first to feel its
absence. His wet feet froze the faster, and his exposed fingers numbed the
faster, though they had not yet begun to freeze. Nose and cheeks were already
freezing, while the skin of all his body chilled as it lost its blood.

All of which counted for
little. There was the fire, snapping and crackling and promising life with
every dancing flame. He started to untie his moccasins. They were coated with
ice; the thick German socks were like sheaths of iron halfway to the knees; and
the moccasin strings were like rods of steel all twisted and knotted as by some
conflagration. For a moment he tugged with his numb fingers, then, realizing
the folly of it, he drew his sheath-knife.
But before he could cut
the strings, it happened. It was his own fault or, rather, his mistake. He
should not have built the fire under the spruce tree. He should have built it
in the open. But it had been easier to pull the twigs from the brush and drop
them directly on the fire. Now the tree under which he had done this carried a
weight of snow on its boughs. No wind had blown for weeks, and each bough was
fully freighted. Each time he had pulled a twig he had communicated a slight
agitation to the tree—an imperceptible agitation, so far as he was concerned,
but an agitation sufficient to bring about the disaster. High up in the tree
one bough capsized its load of snow. This fell on the boughs beneath, capsizing
them. This process continued, spreading out and involving the whole tree. It
grew like an avalanche, and it descended without warning upon the man and the
fire, and the fire was blotted out! Where it had burned was a mantle of fresh
and disordered snow.
The man was shocked. It
was as though he had just heard his own sentence of death. For a moment he sat
and stared at the spot where the fire had been. Then he grew very calm. Perhaps
the old-timer on Sulphur Creek was right. If he had only had a trail-mate he
would have been in no danger now. The trail-mate could have built the fire.
Well, it was up to him to build the fire over again, and this second time there
must be no failure. Even if he succeeded, he would most likely lose some toes.
His feet must be badly frozen by now, and there would be some time before the second
fire was ready.
Such were his thoughts,
but he did not sit and think them. He was busy all the time they were passing
through his mind. He made a new foundation for a fire, this time in the open,
where no treacherous tree could blot it out. Next, he gathered dry grasses and
tiny twigs from the high-water flotsam. He could not bring his fingers together
to pull them out, but he was able to gather them by the handful. In this way he
got many rotten twigs and bits of green moss that were undesirable, but it was
the best he could do. He worked methodically, even collecting an armful of the
larger branches to be used later when the fire gathered strength. And all the
while the dog sat and watched him, a certain yearning wistfulness in its eyes,
for it looked upon him as the fire-provider, and the fire was slow in coming.
When all was ready, the
man reached in his pocket for a second piece of birch-bark. He knew the bark
was there, and, though he could not feel it with his fingers, he could hear its
crisp rustling as he fumbled for it. Try as he would, he could not clutch hold
of it. And all the time, in his consciousness, was the knowledge that each
instant his feet were freezing. This thought tended to put him in a panic, but
he fought against it and kept calm. He pulled on his mittens with his teeth,
and threshed his arms back and forth, beating his hands with all his might
against his sides. He did this sitting down, and he stood up to do it; and all
the while the dog sat in the snow, its wolf-brush of a tail curled around
warmly over its forefeet, its sharp wolf-ears pricked forward intently as it
watched the man. And the man, as he beat and threshed with his arms and hands,
felt a great surge of envy as he regarded the creature that was warm and secure
in its natural covering.
After a time he was
aware of the first faraway signals of sensation in his beaten fingers. The
faint tingling grew stronger till it evolved into a stinging ache that was
excruciating, but which the man hailed with satisfaction. He stripped the
mitten from his right hand and fetched forth the birch-bark. The exposed
fingers were quickly going numb again. Next he brought out his bunch of sulphur
matches. But the tremendous cold had already driven the life out of his
fingers. In his effort to separate one match from the others, the whole bunch
fell in the snow. He tried to pick it out of the snow, but failed. The dead
fingers could neither touch nor clutch. He was very careful. He drove the
thought of his freezing feet, and nose, and cheeks, out of his mind, devoting
his whole soul to the matches. He watched, using the sense of vision in place
of that of touch, and when he saw his fingers on each side the bunch, he closed
them—that is, he willed to close them, for the wires were down, and the fingers
did not obey. He pulled the mitten on the right hand, and beat it fiercely
against his knee. Then, with both mittened hands, he scooped the bunch of
matches, along with much snow, into his lap. Yet he was no better off.

The old-timer on Sulphur
Creek was right, he thought in the moment of controlled despair that ensued:
after fifty below, a man should travel with a partner. He beat his hands, but
failed in exciting any sensation. Suddenly he bared both hands, removing the
mittens with his teeth. He caught the whole bunch between the heels of his
hands. His arm-muscles not being frozen enabled him to press the hand-heels
tightly against the matches. Then he scratched the bunch along his leg. It
flared into flame, seventy sulphur matches at once! There was no wind to blow
them out. He kept his head to one side to escape the strangling fumes, and held
the blazing bunch to the birch-bark. As he so held it, he became aware of
sensation in his hand. His flesh was burning. He could smell it. Deep down
below the surface he could feel it. The sensation developed into pain that grew
acute. And still he endured it, holding the flame of the matches clumsily to
the bark that would not light readily because his own burning hands were in the
way, absorbing most of the flame.
At last, when he could
endure no more, he jerked his hands apart. The blazing matches fell sizzling
into the snow, but the birch-bark was alight. He began laying dry grasses and
the tiniest twigs on the flame. He could not pick and choose, for he had to
lift the fuel between the heels of his hands. Small pieces of rotten wood and
green moss clung to the twigs, and he bit them off as well as he could with his
teeth. He cherished the flame carefully and awkwardly. It meant life, and it
must not perish. The withdrawal of blood from the surface of his body now made
him begin to shiver, and he grew more awkward. A large piece of green moss fell
squarely on the little fire. He tried to poke it out with his fingers, but his
shivering frame made him poke too far, and he disrupted the nucleus of the
little fire, the burning grasses and tiny twigs separating and scattering. He
tried to poke them together again, but in spite of the tenseness of the effort,
his shivering got away with him, and the twigs were hopelessly scattered. Each
twig gushed a puff of smoke and went out. The fire-provider had failed. As he
looked apathetically about him, his eyes chanced on the dog, sitting across the
ruins of the fire from him, in the snow, making restless, hunching movements,
slightly lifting one forefoot and then the other, shifting its weight back and
forth on them with wistful eagerness.
The sight of the dog put
a wild idea into his head. He remembered the tale of the man, caught in a
blizzard, who killed a steer and crawled inside the carcass, and so was saved.
He would kill the dog and bury his hands in the warm body until the numbness
went out of them. Then he could build another fire. He spoke to the dog,
calling it to him; but in his voice was a strange note of fear that frightened
the animal, who had never known the man to speak in such way before. Something
was the matter, and its suspicious nature sensed danger—it knew not what
danger, but somewhere, somehow, in its brain arose an apprehension of the man.
It flattened its ears down at the sound of the man's voice, and its restless,
hunching movements and the liftings and shiftings of its forefeet became more
pronounced; but it would not come to the man. He got on his hands and knees and
crawled toward the dog. This unusual posture again excited suspicion, and the
animal sidled mincingly away.
The man sat up in the
snow for a moment and struggled for calmness. Then he pulled on his mittens, by
means of his teeth, and got upon his feet. He glanced down at first in order to
assure himself that he was really standing up, for the absence of sensation in
his feet left him unrelated to the earth. His erect position in itself started
to drive the webs of suspicion from the dog's mind; and when he spoke
peremptorily, with the sound of whip-lashes in his voice, the dog rendered its
customary allegiance and came to him. As it came within reaching distance, the
man lost his control. His arms flashed out to the dog, and he experienced
genuine surprise when he discovered that his hands could not clutch, that there
was neither bend nor feeling in the fingers. He had forgotten for the moment
that they were frozen and that they were freezing more and more. All this
happened quickly, and before the animal could get away, he encircled its body
with his arms. He sat down in the snow, and in this fashion held the dog, while
it snarled and whined and struggled.
But it was all he could
do, hold its body encircled in his arms and sit there. He realized that he
could not kill the dog. There was no way to do it. With his helpess hands he
could neither draw nor hold his sheath-knife nor throttle the animal. He
released it, and it plunged wildly away, with tail between its legs, and still
snarling. It halted forty feet away and surveyed him curiously, with ears
sharply pricked forward. The man looked down at his hands in order to locate
them, and found them hanging on the ends of his arms. It struck him as curious
that one should have to use his eyes in order to find out where his hands were.
He began threshing his arms back and forth, beating the mittened hands against
his sides. He did this for five minutes, violently, and his heart pumped enough
blood up to the surface to put a stop to his shivering. But no sensation was
aroused in the hands. He had an impression that they hung like weights on the
ends of his arms, but when he tried to run the impression down, he could not
find it.
A certain fear of death,
dull and oppressive, came to him. This fear quickly became poignant as he
realized that it was no longer a mere matter of freezing his fingers and toes,
or of losing his hands and feet, but that it was a matter of life and death
with the chances against him. This threw him into a panic, and he turned and
ran up the creek-bed along the old, dim trail. The dog joined in behind and
kept up with him. He ran blindly, without intention, in fear such as he had
never known in his life. Slowly, as he ploughed and floundered through the
snow, he began to see things again,—the banks of the creek, the old
timber-jams, the leafless aspens, and the sky. The running made him feel
better. He did not shiver. Maybe, if he ran on, his feet would thaw out; and,
anyway, if he ran far enough, he would reach camp and the boys. Without doubt
he would lose some fingers and toes and some of his face; but the boys would
take care of him, and save the rest of him when he got there. And at the same
time there was another thought in his mind that said he would never get to the
camp and the boys; that it was too many miles away, that the freezing had too
great a start on him, and that he would soon be stiff and dead. This thought he
kept in the background and refused to consider. Sometimes it pushed itself
forward and demanded to be heard, but he thrust it back and strove to think of
other things.
It struck him as curious
that he could run at all on feet so frozen that he could not feel them when
they struck the earth and took the weight of his body. He seemed to himself to
skim along above the surface, and to have no connection with the earth.
Somewhere he had once seen a winged Mercury, and he wondered if Mercury felt as
he felt when skimming over the earth.
His theory of running
until he reached camp and the boys had one flaw in it: he lacked the endurance.
Several times he stumbled, and finally he tottered, crumpled up, and fell. When
he tried to rise, he failed. He must sit and rest, he decided, and next time he
would merely walk and keep on going. As he sat and regained his breath, he
noted that he was feeling quite warm and comfortable. He was not shivering, and
it even seemed that a warm glow had come to his chest and trunk. And yet, when
he touched his nose or cheeks, there was no sensation. Running would not thaw
them out. Nor would it thaw out his hands and feet. Then the thought came to
him that the frozen portions of his body must be extending. He tried to keep
this thought down, to forget it, to think of something else; he was aware of
the panicky feeling that it caused, and he was afraid of the panic. But the
thought asserted itself, and persisted, until it produced a vision of his body
totally frozen. This was too much, and he made another wild run along the
trail. Once he slowed down to a walk, but the thought of the freezing extending
itself made him run again.
And all the time the dog
ran with him, at his heels. When he fell down a second time, it curled its tail
over its forefeet and sat in front of him, facing him, curiously eager and
intent. The warmth and security of the animal angered him, and he cursed it
till it flattened down its ears appeasingly. This time the shivering came more
quickly upon the man. He was losing in his battle with the frost. It was
creeping into his body from all sides. The thought of it drove him on, but he
ran no more than a hundred feet, when he staggered and pitched headlong. It was
his last panic. When he had recovered his breath and control, he sat up and
entertained in his mind the conception of meeting death with dignity. However,
the conception did not come to him in such terms. His idea of it was that he
had been making a fool of himself, running around like a chicken with its head
cut off—such was the simile that occurred to him. Well, he was bound to freeze
anyway, and he might as well take it decently. With this new-found peace of
mind came the first glimmerings of drowsiness. A good idea, he thought, to sleep
off to death. It was like taking an anaesthetic. Freezing was not so bad as
people thought. There were lots worse ways to die.
He pictured the boys
finding his body next day. Suddenly he found himself with them, coming along
the trail and looking for himself. And, still with them, he came around a turn
in the trail and found himself lying in the snow. He did not belong with
himself any more, for even then he was out of himself, standing with the boys
and looking at himself in the snow. It certainly was cold, was his thought.
When he got back to the States he could tell the folks what real cold was. He
drifted on from this to a vision of the old-timer on Sulphur Creek. He could
see him quite clearly, warm and comfortable, and smoking a pipe.
"You were right,
old hoss; you were right," the man mumbled to the old-timer of Sulphur
Creek.
Then the man drowsed off
into what seemed to him the most comfortable and satisfying sleep he had ever
known. The dog sat facing him and waiting. The brief day drew to a close in a
long, slow twilight. There were no signs of a fire to be made, and, besides,
never in the dog's experience had it known a man to sit like that in the snow
and make no fire. As the twilight drew on, its eager yearning for the fire
mastered it, and with a great lifting and shifting of forefeet, it whined
softly, then flattened its ears down in anticipation of being chidden by the
man. But the man remained silent. Later, the dog whined loudly. And still later
it crept close to the man and caught the scent of death. This made the animal
bristle and back away. A little longer it delayed, howling under the stars that
leaped and danced and shone brightly in the cold sky. Then it turned and
trotted up the trail in the direction of the camp it knew, where were the other
food-providers and fire-providers. – End
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